Time

Where did the time go? The spring break in Denmark is coming to an end. I'm sitting here Sunday 1am, trying to not to miss all the time I have before me. There are times where I want the time to pass by as quick as possible. Yet, on the other hand... I don't want it to. Not at all. 
I mean, what am I waiting for? Not anything, really. My life has been kind of stuck in an evil circle. Nothing new is happening and I can't do what I want to for everyone.
I keep telling myself to live in the now and enjoy the days as much as possible though.

School starts tomorrow, and I'm certainly not ready. 
I should go sleep, but I think I need to write here before I do so.
I'm just glad I've been able to relax. I even got to catch up with more recordings than expected.
Things have been stressful before the school break begun. It's not only school, there have been a lot of things. Not anything serious, just a lot of things all coming at once. It has surely affected my mood heavily. I could barely see an end to it.
Oh well, that's life. I got through it. It surely took me some time to catch up with sleep, but it's all good now.

I sound like I pity myself. Even if I do, I've always believed that you have to admit how you feel, no matter what others think. It is selfish, but can you do anything without being selfish at some points? In my eyes, you cannot. And that doesn't mean there's anything bad about it. 

Haha, I guess I should stop before ending up writing a whole novel.
 
Guess I'll be back later.
 

My Final Fantasy Obsession

Since I've been sick a lot recently and haven't been able to go to school, I've sure not had much to do lately.
Therefore I decided to play a lot of Final Fantasy games again.

I happen to be a big fan of the franchise and after I started to play the games again, my obsession is back at the fullest.
Despite all this, I've never signed up for a Square Enix account before last month, lol. I surely asked myself why I didn't do that to begin with afterwards.
I'm always slow at discovering the latest news, so I didn't even know that Final Fantasy VII were re-released for PC as a digital download. I found out two days after its release so I didn't have to wait, hahaha.
Anyway, point is I mentally freaked out when I heard about it. I've been searching for the game for many years. I used to play it with a childhood friend I lost contact with, so I never actually owned the game.
But yeah, now I downloaded it and I'm super happy XD. It's awesome to relive the story, though it almost seem like a new experience to me- I played this game when I was around 10-11 which means my English abilities were lacking. Made me realize the story I "remember" is most likely something I've seen and read through the years, haha, but ttill awesome to play it again- though I didn't understand that much back then, it surely caught my attention.
Don't worry by the way, I'm not biased towards this game, but it was the first one I got play.

I also played FFX again... You know, I never thought I would ever describe a game as "beautiful", but well- I actually think FFX is a beautiful game. I really want to cover "Suteki Da Ne". I recently listened to the song and it made me sorta nostalgic, lol.

Then at last- I bought Final Fantasy XIII-2 back in July. I know how many people really don't like the 13th installment but in fact I do. I actually fully understand the general critiques and arguments from people who don't like it, but it personally doesn't prevent me from enjoying the game.
Yet, as one who liked FFXIII, I think XIII-2 is better. I think SE took good advantance of the critiques they received from the previous game. I'm not fond of the ending, I think the characters fate is left very open- but then I'm just excited to see how they make up for it in "Lightning returns".

Wow that was one long post. Sorry for being all nerdy, haha. I don't care whether I'm like that though.

Do you like the FF franchise too? Talk to me about it, don't be shy! I love sharing interests. I own about 12 FF games so I'm familiar with most of it. And yes- I'm a collector, lol.

Sick again

Great.
So now I'm sick again. What the heck are the odds?
I've wanted to sing for a long time. I've had the chance to record a bit for collaborations but I never finished anything. Time's been pretty limited for me, I guess- when I finally had the time my throat just messed everything up again. How wonderful, haha.
It's been months since I've been able to fully enjoy singing. Everytime I've had the chance to sing, it's been good but also a bit too much in a rush.
I might be sorta whiny to complain. I don't really care. It's not like I talk about how I feel about it, I only write about it in my blog and have mention it to a very few people. So I guess it doesn't matter that much as long as I don't bother people with it, lol.
C'est la vie, eh? Things aren't always as one wish them to be and I'm fully aware of that.

I talk so much about singing, lol. It's just because it's my passion. I hope it can become an even bigger part of my life (if it's possible, lol) if you know what I mean.

Nevermind...

Urgh, I guess I can just forget about my hope's of being able to sing this weekend. I think I'm having a sore throat...

Moving Forward

My school start has definitely been less exhausting than I expected.

I only attended class for two days before I got a high fever and a sore throat. It seriously made me worried - from that day there was only a week till ZEN4's concert at Genki con. 

I ended up staying home for a whole week. I wasn't able to do anything during those days, so it has been seriously stressful for me knowing that I wouldn't be able to practice as much as I planned to.

I didn't fully recover for the weekend where we had our concert but everything went well... Zarah, Celia, Sofie, Sille and Trine did an amazing job. My mic didn't always work. Made me feel like I was lacking, but I'm ok with it now.

I was still a bit sick after the day of the concert and I had a lot of things to catch up with in school. I was sure I was going to stress out completely, but it went fine. Not that much homework and I actually felt like I had been active for this whole week. That is pretty unusual for someone like me (lol).

However, I've had a lot of essays due this week. I just finished them so luckily I don't have to do anything school related this weekend, lol. Incredibly enough, my voice didn't really recover before yesterday/today. Maybe I'll be able to work on some duets I owe? I truly hope so.
I delay everything, and I feel bad. A complete idiot. I understand if people are upset.
Still doing my best though! Hope I can catch up with things soon. 

It's Unfair

It makes me so sad to see people who deserve better lose hope...

It's not fair.

::FAQ::

Decided to make an FAQ since my inbox is constantly filled with similar questions.

The fact that I get the same questions does not bother me - I'm just making this to make it easier to get the answers you want from me :). So always feel free to ask, but you can see here if what you're looking for is already written here.

「Devices and softwares」

::What softwares do you use for mixing?::

- I switch between SONAR 6 LE and Adobe Audition 5.

::What do you use as recording devices?::

- Golden Age Project F3, and EMU 0404.

::What do you use for video mixing?::

- I currently use PowerDirector 10.

::Video designs?::

- Corel Paint Shop Pro X.

「Personal, etc」

::Where are you from?::

- I'm born in Korea, but raised in Denmark.

::How old are you?::

- 18.

::Do you have facebook, twitter, tumblr, etc?::

- My twitter is @SeulKiEG.

My tumblr is EverlastingGoals. I have a facebook, but I since I consider it as a personal thing I do not reveal my account unless I know you personally.

::How many people own this channel?::
- Actually this is not a frequently asked question, but I constantly receive comments where people refer to me as "you guys", "these guys", etc, hahaha.
It's certainly only me on this channel. If you see any rude or suspicious content from my channel, it's definitely not me.

::Are you a boy or a girl?::
- I was a girl last time I checked.

That's what I remember for now. I'll keep adding things as I get to remember them.

I can't...

What a horrible night...
Took me at least three hours to sleep. I saw it again... It still comes back to me once in a while. I wish I could let go. It made my head ache and I'm still sick so I coughed a lot. It was raining like hell... I heard thunder outside and saw the quick flash of thunder through my window. Felt like it was never going to end.

When I finally fell asleep I had a nightmare and woke up choking. I've been exhausted all day.

I guess I can't stop thinking of it because I never talked to anyone about it.
I really should have told someone... But it's too late now.

Danish culture at this point made me realize...

That I’ve become so negative.
I think the Danish standard mind is… Negative. Plain negative. I don’t wan to be like that, I will try to change it.
I got to think of it because a complete stranger greeted me this morning. Never seen that person before and he WAS really greeting me. I even looked around to be sure and there were no one else around us. Just a simple ”Good morning”.

I realized that I looked at him as he was some kind of idiot, so I hope I made up for it by smiling when greeting him back. I was just surprised. Very surprised in fact.

In Denmark in general you don’t greet strangers like you do in many other cultures. You barely greet people you know or kinda know and if you do, you won’t be surprised if you get ignored.


I usually greet people but sometimes I don’t know if I should or not because I know they are going to ignore me. I do feel very dumb when I greet someone who ignore me, but it’s the standard here.


I do not think everybody is like this, but I’m 100% sure every Dane know what I’m talking about.

A more extreme example- I saw a show in the beginning of the year called “Hero’s Gala”. It was about people who have made a difference around the world. Some actions were big, others were small but precious.
There were two boys who saved two girls from drowning in a public swimming bath. They were asked in the show if they had any further comments for their action and their reply was: “We only did what everyone else would have done”. Such brave boys, glad there are people like them out there- but the answer is unfortunately incorrect. No one did anything, the girls were even REALLY close to death before they were saved. That is in fact very sad.
If you pass out on a Danish street, have a physical attack, anything like that- you can’t expect anyone to help you. They’re going to act like they don’t notice you or other things like that.
It’s a actually a pretty bad and discussed issue here in Denmark. We all know it’s a big problem and there are lots of novels, songs, poets, etc written about this.
An other example is when I once got into a bus after some procrastinating in the mall. The bus driver smiled at me, welcomed me and wished me a good day. For the first 3 nano seconds I thought “What are you? Which planet do you come from???”. But then I realized that there were just someone polite and forthcoming out there for once. I smiled back and wished him a good day too.
Made me in a better mood. Happy people makes you happy too, eh? Even if it’s a stranger and you only get a bit of it.

We have to put a smile on. That’s how we survive. Right? 

Yesterday

Tumblr: 4 months ago

My singing teacher taught me something important.
When we’re having a hard time and talk to other people about it, we’ve all tried to get the comment back saying “there are people out there feeling much worse than you”.
Ok, before I’m getting to my point, I’d like to say that this depends on your situation.

She asked me if I was ok and that I looked frustrated. I told her I had a hard time because of some issues and it made me forget to practice singing a lot “but I shouldn’t complain because I’m only a student and there are people out there feeling worse than me”. My words were honest, but I only added that comment because I didn’t want to hear it from her.
Instead she said “It’s ok you find it tough. There might be people out there who are having a harder time than you, but you must think about where you are now and what your situation is. What’s tough for you might not be tough for others but if they don’t think your issues are a big deal, it doesn’t mean they have the right to criticize you for it. It’s selfish, but it doesn’t make you careless”.I’ve never really thought about it that way. I just don’t want to be selfish, but I will remember this.


Since my English isn’t brilliant, I do not know if I expressed myself right, but I hope so. 

Tomboys and feminine guys

Tumblr: 4 months ago

I highly dislike how people are put into the either “masculine” or “feminine” box.

I don’t get why we just can’t break the standards and realize that it doesn’t matter, and you can be exactly how you want to. We live in the 21st century after all.

My parents let me be what I want to, unless it will hurt others or myself, I don’t get why people just can’t stick with that, instead of living in fear of not doing the so-called right thing and fit in.

I can’t talk to most people about gender standards coz they don’t get what I’m saying… lol.

One of the things that piss me off is:

People like Amber Liu is called a “boy/tomboy/masculine” and bla bla so on. We hear it ALL THE TIME. Constantly. People will never stop mentioning it. But what if she was a boy? - You would say she looked like a girl. I’m 100% sure it would have been so.

Also Justin Bieber. I’m tired of hearing people saying he looks like a girl, coz if he was a girl he would be “such a man” to most of you.

There are a LOT more people in the same boat. Especially several male k-pop stars. I’m totally sick of it. Accept them for what they are!!! Not something they obviously aren’t.

That’s it. My rant is over, lol.

Life?

It’s fun how many people complain about not having a life.

I personally think people who say so, have more life than some others coz those who truly don’t would never admit it.

Tumblr

Just posting my tumblr rants because I think it belongs to this blog instead.

First Post

I'm one of those people who have this twisted need to post inner thoughts on the internet.
Therefore, I don't really care who reads it and I don't care if you give a shit about my posts or not.
Harshly said, but that's how it is.

This blog is only made for selfish purposes.